Ssup

I claim the right to be who I want to be. Regardless of my choice, I will find those who agree and those who don't. I will gain support, and I will confront opposition, but I will stand firmly as me. It is my choice. It is the only real choice I have to make ∞


Old Mail
Love is pain...
Friday, December 20, 2013 ★ 0 Comment(s)
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Well if love is pain, then this pain must be love. So now i keep it way down deep, but yet it's still not enough. Cause it's always the last thing i think of as i try to fall asleep. And its the first thing i notice as i begin to wake up. They say its better to have love and lost than to have never loved at all. But i didn't know how much love would cost or how hard i could fall again and again...

So now there's this pain in my heart, that I'm trying so hard to understand. But as it continues to fall apart, i feel it will start to change me from who I am. Cause now i so strongly believe, that for me its too late, and  how easy it is for me, to only love the things that i hate. Because there's this hole in my chest where my heart use to be. Once again i put it to the test, but only to fail so miserable. And now without I'm falling apart, I am dying inside, wondering who will has my heart....

So now there's this pain in my heart, that I'm trying so hard to understand. But as it continues to fall apart, i feel it will start to change me from who I am. Cause now i so strongly believe, that for me its too late, and  how easy it is for me, to only love the things that i hate. Because there's this hole in my chest where my heart use to be. Once again i put it to the test, but only to fail so miserable. And it's who give our hearts to that makes it such a dangerous place. Because when hate is all around you, finding love becomes so hard to face. And when you start to fall only hoping it doesn't break, you give them your heart and all, and that's exactly what they take. And now without it, it seems like i have nothing left to gain. Just not sure anymore of what it means, when you start to miss the pain. And now there is no more pain in this heart, that I've  had for so long to bare. It seems that it has completely fallen apart. Because im just not the same as i was before, where it came so easy for me to care. And now without being able to feel, to me my past is becoming so strange. I'm  just not really sure anymore of what's real. And the only thing i know now is just how fast hearts can change...now without I'm falling apart, I am dying inside, wondering who has my heart....


"love is pain you can not feel. a burning scar you can not heal. there is no pain when loves around. it leaves no mark so scent no sound, your not aware of all the pain. until along comes the day, the love is gone and then you'll know, the pain inside will start to show. it leaves a mark once your apart, not on the skin but on the heart......."

Note to self :

"Be the type of person that you want to meet in future...." 
real me ,
mlina.